Monday, April 2, 2012
I've been thinking about movement today.
These thoughts linger with me particularly after a conversation with another mom at story time today. She was certainly not the first mother that has expressed a little envy at the fact that my own daughter, of toddling age, isn't toddling yet. Or moving really at all, beyond a few inches here and there.
Yes, occasionally when I'm feeling lazy, the fact that I can sit with Cora in my lap while the rest of the moms chase their crazy children all over the place seems like a benefit. The fact that I can plop her in the center of the room with a toy or a book and walk away, confident that she will be in the same place when I return, has some positive aspects.
And I understand that a typical babyhood goes by so fast. Before you know it, your baby is moving and crawling, shimmying and shaking, running all over the place and you can barely baby proof fast enough, let alone ever keep up. I get it. I see it happening all around me.
In the meantime I am trying to patiently coax a girl who for months has been barely army crawling into a quadruped, kicking and screaming all the way. I am trying to convince her to push up on her arms, to learn to get into sitting on her own, to even attempt to move from her comfort zone the slightest. But she'd rather me do things for her. Get things for her.
And I keep thinking of all the things she's still missing out on: interacting with others other than me, getting to the good stuff, experiencing a sense of independence (beyond the control she manages to wrestle when choosing what to eat and when to keep us awake at night). I have to keep reminding myself that she'll get there. But it's hard not to think that she could benefit so much from it now.
A lot of this is just her personality. She's not ready to do things until she's good and ready. And she's not inclined to want to move around. She loves to sit and play, be played with, read and sing and interact, all while sitting on her cute little tush.
And that's OK, really.
But sometimes it bothers me when people tell me how great it is that she doesn't want to move. They are completely speaking from their own exhaustion, this I know. They don't even think about the fact that it hurts me just a bit, that my own girl isn't quite capable yet, or if she is capable, she's not ready. And that this is taking a great deal of work for her to do things that their own children were doing in the blink of an eye and with virtually no encouragement.
So sometimes it gets annoying.
But I know that the intent is good. And I really do appreciate the interaction with the other mamas. I like it that Cora gets to watch their children run around and play, hoping that one day she might find the idea of joining in appealing.
In the meantime, I try and encourage her independence. I don't run to get her things, but try to help her get them herself. But she still needs a lot of help. And I'm here to help her.