Sisterly Love

These girls melt my heart.

I didn't think I could find a person who could love Cora as much as Nick and I do.

But Ruby's love for her sister is blinding.  And Cora is pretty smitten too.  These little souls were meant to be.

The Good and Beautiful

I feel like writing about how ridiculously hard this long-term, reduces me-to-the-rawest-of-nerves sleep deprivation is going.  But just thinking about summoning those words makes me want to cry.

I often have the desire to write.  But in between the endless days with the kids, my barely-getting-it-done work, and my desperate and usually failed attempts to get rest, writing gets shuffled to the bottom of priorities.

There are many good and beautiful things going on, even as I fight the brain fog that seems to be winning.

These two are my good and my beautiful.

Every time I feel the desire to write about my girls, I start looking at their photos, and my words seem to escape me. 

I just can't seem to get past how much their growing love and friendship gets to me.  It's like magic.  It's healing.  It definitely makes me forget how many times I'm up at night... at least for a few minutes.  You know, until the next power struggle, tantrum, or screeching baby breaks the spell.

It's so beautiful to watch unfold.  What gets me more than anything is how much Ruby loves her sister.  How hard she will laugh at Cora's antics.  Gut-splitting, breath-stopping laughter. 
 

I see their love for one another and I can't believe I ever doubted the decision to add to our family.  So many of my worries seem so silly now.  I worried about how Cora would feel about her sister, about how my relationship with her would change.  I didn't spend nearly as much time thinking about how it would be for Ruby to enter this family.

Turns out Ruby thinks it's a hoot.  And I'm so glad.

I know that their relationship will grow and change as they grow and change.  Already, I'm feeling dizzy from how fast things are going.  This baby will be running circles around me very, very soon.  This big girl is almost done with her first year of preschool and is astounding me all the time.

This life is full of beauty and joy and love.

But damn it, I'd enjoy it so much more with a little bit of sleep.

Happy Heart Day

To the beautiful, silly, hilarious one who stole my heart just over four years ago.

On this day, four years after the open heart surgery that saved your precious life, I am oh so grateful.  Grateful that the surgery gave me you.  I can't even imagine life without you, and I never want to have to try.

Happy 4th Heart Day, sweet Cora.

Easter Eggs

 

 

Date Day

Dates have taken on new meaning around here, after having kids.

In the last few years before becoming parents, most of our dates involved good food and maybe an adult beverage or two.  The rare late night out would involved friends and maybe some music or sitting around a backyard fire.  After kids, dates for the two of us are very few and far between. 

The last real date Nick and I shared was almost exactly a year ago, when I was about 6 months pregnant with Ruby.  We spent the night in Seattle while Cora had a slumber party with her Grammie.  The big night out consisted of a lovely dinner out and an extremely early bedtime for us.  A full night of uninterrupted sleep after good food was as much excitement as we could hope for, especially with chronic sleep deprivation and a very uncomfortable pregnancy.

But today Cora got to have a date with her Daddy, leaving me and Ruby at home to spend some quiet time together.  Usually during the rare times that they share time alone, they'll go on a bike ride to the park, or some other place that we visit often. Today they went for a new adventure together, and rode the train along the waterfront.

Cora was pretty excited.

Yes, all the photos are from phones.

On the train!

One of the many bridges

She was apparently very well behaved.  It must have been the novelty, since Nick did not have to carry her over his shoulder at any point.  I'll consider that a win.

And in the meantime, I got to have some mellow time with this little sweetie.  We got to hang out and trade smiles while she sat in the swing.

She got to dive into the sandbox and get her first taste of sand.

And I got to sit and watch her without chasing a squealing preschooler down the driveway.  No cajoling or bribing occurred.  No redirection or motivators to scramble for.  I did have to retrieve some sharp sticks, and swipe some leaves out of her mouth after she started gagging, but all in all it was calm and relaxed.

It was nice to have some one-on-one time with my little one, if only for a couple of hours.

But it was also pretty nice to welcome back my big girl and hear her excited answers to my questions about the train.  It was nice to feel refreshed, even if it wasn't quite a break.

As nice as it is to have time together with the four of us, it was exciting to mix it up and have some special date time with our girls.  We'll have to make it a habit more often.

World Down Syndrome Day

Pesky Little Sister